Enron Accountant

Received through email.

A friend told me the following story about a former Enron accountant who gave up his CPA position to become a farmer. The first thing he decided to do was to buy a mule.

He dickers with a local farmer at the general store, and they agree that the local will sell the accountant a mule for $100. The Enron accountant gives the man $100 cash, and the man agrees to deliver the mule the next day.

Next morning, the man shows up at the Enron accountant’s place without the mule. “I’m sorry,” he explains, “but the mule died last night. I guess I owe you the $100 back.”

“Hey, no problem,” says the accountant. “Just keep the money, and as for the mule, hey, go ahead and dump him in my barn anyway. I’ll raffle him off.”

“Ain’t nobody around here going to buy a dead mule,” says the local farmer.

“Leave that to me. I worked for Enron,” replies the accountant.

A week later, the farmer meets the accountant back at the general store, and asks, “So, how’d you make out with the dead mule?”

“Great,” replies the accountant. “I sold over 1000 raffle tickets for $2 each, to my former stockholders and debtholders. Nobody ever bothered to ask if the mule was alive or not.”

“But didn’t the winner complain when he found out?” asked the farmer.

“Yep, he sure did, and being the honest, ethical man that I am, I refunded his $2 to him promptly.”

“So my profit, after deducting my $100 cost for the dead mule and the $2 sales allowance, is $1898. By the way, do you have any chickens you want to sell?”