Satire Segues to Rage

It becomes increasingly obvious that the current state of the U.S. economy is so bad largely because the sensibilities of the average U.S. citizen, though previously thought infinitely malleable, have finally been stretched to the breaking point. Even satire and comedic places of refuge that ordinarily hide their opinions behind jokes are applying a thinner veneer to their feelings these days.

Two articles by some oft-quoted (at least here) satire sites come extremely close to simply reporting the facts, unnalloyed by exaggeration, simply because current events are so ironic already. These articles must just pretty much write themselves; I think it’s easier than ever being a writer of irony these days.

Bush Vows Crackdown on Corporate Corruption Unless It Happened In 1990… on SatireWire outlines Bush’s ten-point plan for punishing and preventing white-collar crime of the extraordinary audacity and scope we’ve recently seen exposed. Of course, it was appropriately modified to cover his ass:

“Corporate officers who benefit from false accounting statements should forfeit all money gained by their fraud, unless that number equals $848,560. … Today, I am calling for a new ethic of personal responsibility in the business community,“ he said, “an ethic that will increase investor confidence, regain the trust of the American people, and not be retroactive.”

President Issues New Guidelines for Corporate Ethics… on White House.Org is more voluble and to-the-point when rewriting Bush’s speech for him:

“Yes, today I’m here on behalf of the American people − at least the non-millionaire, non-ivy legacy, non-landed gentry American people who are always getting in the way of our rightful and deserved progress. Unfortunately, I need to keep those poor morons deluded and happy if our kind are to win the next election, and at present, they’re plenty steamed over the way you boys have been conducting business lately.”

Even more traditional and extremely mainstream sources of humor are showing their anger openly, though it’s hard not be cynical in these cases and wonder whether the openness simply desensitizes people to the awful reality more than it opens their eyes to it.

In the New York Newsday, Jay Leno was quoted as saying: “The New York Times reported that President Bush now has a formal plan to invade Iraq. They say the key to this plan: timing. The article said the attack will begin the minute Bush’s popularity falls below 52 percent.” In the same batch of Punchlines, David Letterman is also quoted as saying “[President Bush] gave a speech imploring people to crack down on accounting fraud, and I’m thinking, ‘Accounting fraud − isn’t that how he got elected?’”