The article, <a href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2009/02/18/notes021809.DTL" source="SF Chronicle" author="Mark Morford" title="I Twitter for you! Too old/busy/jaded to 'social network,' but still want to seem hip? Call now!">I Twitter for you!</a>, is about a great new service called <a href="http://www.geekamania.com/Welcome.html" source="" author="">Geekamania</a>. This site takes mechanical turking to a whole new level by providing a service unique to the new millenium: integrating you into the online world in a "cool" way.<fn> Here's the sales pitch: <bq>We design, set up and maintain as many hip social networking pages as you want, spinning off the information you provided but also totally rearranging it and making it up at will, all to make you sound exactly as cute/clever/sexy/boring/lonely/unstable (you choose) as you've always dreamed. You don't have to do a thing!</bq> The information you provide include a mountain of personal details as well as as many pictures as you can provide. To be honest, though, most of the people you know online haven't seen you in decades, so you don't really have to stick to actual reality ... and neither does Geekamania. In fact, you'll be able to watch as they start to build an online personality for you that that will make even <i>you</i> jealous. How, you may ask, can they do this? Are they employing an army of call-center workers in Bombay? How will they possibly strike just the right, cool tone you need in order to claw your way to social-networking ascendancy? The service is one of the first to grow out of the slumping global economy and can be deemed a forerunner of the kind of "thinking outside of the box" jobs programs that will form the basis for a recovery. <bq>By employing a small army of 5,024 recently laid-off journalists from all major newspapers around the nation, we guarantee basic grammatical accuracy, reasonably clever innuendo, occasional smart-alecky tones and sporadic fact-checking, all wrapped in a professional ability to cull appealing factoids from your otherwise dreary life, just so random people you barely know or haven't seen/cared about in 10 years might envy your every waking moment. How cool is that?</bq> So, if you're feeling overwhelmed by all of your so-called friends who seem to have a bottomless supply of time and energy to invest into their social networking sites, why not opt out and one-up them at the same time? As their slogan says: <iq>Geekamania: Because you don’t have time for this shit.</iq> <hr> <ft>And here's the footnote to head off the gullible: this is one of those "One Page Websites" that was set up by Mark Morford, the author of the linked article. It's a joke; stop looking around for a link to their pricing policy.</ft>