Dubya’s speaking style

Look on the bright side. Each staggering step the US takes towards certain Armageddon is at least always accompanied by an opportunity to engage in some serious “Schadenfreude” when Bush gets trapped on the White House lawn by a pack of reporters. Or maybe he’s flushed out from cover by a serious enough scandal that he’s forced to make some form of official statement.

That’s when the whole flustered, fumbling, repetitive, seriously talking-pointed, single-minded (or no-minded?), redundant deer-in-headlights fun begins. His press conference a couple of weeks ago on prime time was such an opportunity and Get Your War On #34 (MNFTIU) takes full advantage. They describe it as “rubbernecking a highway accident made entirely of words.”

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant — I think that’s the most perfect possible description of Bush’s speaking style. But, wait, there’s more. Bush’s down-home style and manner is often positively contrasted to that of the “East Coast elitists” in Washington:

“All I know is … I can actually think on my feet, I can string two fuckin’ sentences together without notes and I could answer some motherfuckers’ questions about a war without just spitting out eleven different permutations of the same goddamn ‘goo-gah freedom’ phrase! … If ‘elitist’ just means ‘not the dumbest motherfucker in the room,’ I’ll be an elitist!”

That’s really awesome. And finally, let’s see how Bush’s mind works.

“His mind is like one of those spinning cages where you pull out the winning lottery numbers — but there’s only four goddman little balls in his cage: ‘Freedom’, ‘Democracy’, ‘Terror’ and ‘Stay the Course’. He opens his mouth, one of the little balls drops out. That’s not a conversation, that’s Keno.”

Those are just my personal favorites from that strip; there is, of course, much more where that came from.